Ok, so we’re slightly behind in our blogging, so we’ll get this one over with…

Adelaide

The most exciting thing that happened was we bought ourselves a new toothbrush.

Great Ocean Road

We decided to hire a car and drive to Melbourne via the Great Ocean Road. It’s about 800km so whilst I spent the first day battling to keep my eyes open Lyvette spent it with her head out of the window searching for kangaroos – she hadn’t seen one yet and it was causing her distress;
“Why haven’t we seen a kangaroo yet?” I don’t know Lyvette.
“Do they run or jump?” I don’t know Lyvette.
“What time do they come out?” I don’t know Lyvette.
“Do they hang out in groups or wander alone?” I don’t know Lyvette.
“Do they actually punch you or is that just the ones with boxing gloves?” I DON’T KNOW LYVETTE. #AreYouForReal?!

This went on for hours. I didn’t realise it was possible to think of that many kangaroo questions.

Apparently it is.

Then she screamed so loud I could only assume a wasp had landed on her face. “I JUST SAW A KANGAROO. I SAW AN ACTUAL ROO!” So we wheel skidded down the highway into a u turn and then curb crawled for 400m next to this kangaroo. We needn’t have bothered however as we spent the next two hours avoiding roo’s as they jumped out at the car and played chicken with us. Then we needed the toilet and stopped at a Pioneer Village which felt like we’d stepped back in time as we were informed the loo’s were located in between the ‘ship chandlers’ and the ‘fencing display’ by a woman who was wearing a doily on her head. Then it got dark. Then we nearly hit another kangaroo. Then it got darker. Then we nearly hit another kangaroo. These kangaroos were becoming pests. Then we decided we were going to sleep in the car. Then we had to find somewhere to park which wasn’t located in an area where mad axe murders might hunt their prey. This is pretty hard in bush land. Then I needed a poo. Eventually we stopped in a little village and parked outside the public toilets (we went to the toilet together as it was a bit scary – but no Lyvette did not watch me poo in case you were wondering, although I wouldn’t have cared if she had). Then we reclined our seats and settled down for the night using a Nivea towel and a sarong as a duvet. It was freezing. A sarong was not adequate. Luckily we had our India pants and the bed socks that Caz had sent us for Xmas. We woke up at 3am with the hazards glaring and the windscreen wipers going crazy (it’s easily done when you’re sleeping on the driver’s side and have fidgety feet) so we decided to continue on our merry way.

This road trip and sleeping in the car saga continued for two days and three nights visiting some nice towns on the way and driving the Ocean road. The only negative was that we managed to miss the 12 Apostles (one of the main sights along the way). We’re not sure how we managed to do this because we both saw the signs saying “12 APOSTLES” but because we’re thick we decided they weren’t actually the 12 apostles and then got really upset when we realised we’d missed them.

Melbourne

We spent time here meeting up with friends from home, playing giant Jenga, falling off skateboards with Sweden and Germany (our roomies from Kuala Lumpa) and dragging new found friends up the 1000 steps in Dandenong when they all had hangovers (eventually the Irish guy decided he’d had enough and announced we needed a pub).  Lyvette got told she had severely dehydrated skin by every makeup artist in the city and she then had an awkward moment when she was emptying her bowels at the hostel and there was a knock on the door. It was the cleaner. “Excuse me – I’m waiting for you”. That’s never ideal, no one wants an audience.

Tassie

We decided on a cheeky trip to Tasmania to break up our stay in Melbourne. We headed straight for the airport. Well that’s a lie, we actually went to the Airport West Shopping Mall which is nowhere near the airport. Naturally we nearly missed the flight because we decided to ignore all of the collective advice we had been given and made up our own (cheaper) route to the airport. This resulted in us being dropped at a shopping outlet 50 minutes before our flight was due to depart. We eventually found a bus to take us to the actual airport and burst into check in 30 minutes later eager to find those Tasmanian devils (they’re real things by the way) and made our flight with a whole ten minutes to spare (this is ample time for us). Panic over.

Tassie was cold. Really cold. But we had a good time learning about marsupials (if you don’t know what they are Google them), Tassie Devils and meeting Burt the koala (he stank). We also got chased by kangaroos moving in slow motion which was an experience as it subconsciously prompted us to run away in slow motion which just looked like a ridiculous farce – two girls slow mo running in India pants and bed socks whilst being chased by slow motion kangaroos. We also visited Port Arthur prison which turned out to be nicer than the hostel we went back to in Melbourne…

 

 

Melbourne (again)

We came back as Lyvette had tickets to the F1. We arrived at our latest hostel at midnight and we knew it wasn’t going to end well when we were greeted by the stench of rotten fish combined with wet dog and the receptionist was high. The room was so disgusting I tried to sleep without touching the bed and Lyvette was too scared to shower. We think it was a crack den.  Things became too much when the guy in the bunk opposite tried to have sex with himself. Thankfully Jordan and Christy (friends from home) invited us round to their house, made us salmon and let us shower. They weren’t impressed with the fleas and we had to leave our shoes in the next block.

Next we’re heading back to Sydney to meet my cousin Natay (real name Natalie) who is coming to play for a bit (I’m hoping to steal some of her clothes) and we’ll start our travels up the East Coast. This is where the real travelling begins. This blog was just about the calm before the storm…